Music.

Yesterday everything was about music, in one way or another. Music has been a huge part of my life from an early age, most of my happiest memories are tied in with certain songs, certain bands, certain albums and I believe very strongly that we all have our own ‘soundtrack of our life’. Music can lift your mood, it can make you reminisce, it can elicit every emotion from pure joy to poignant sadness. Sometimes, it’s just there, in the background, while you get on with the day.

Yesterday began with a call from IAPT team, a telephone triage to assess my condition and to discuss options. The call lasted about 30 minutes, and I answered a lot of questions, going over everything that’s happened in the last month, and the last year, talking about my thoughts, feelings and opening up about everything. The upshot is that I’ve been referred to the improving wellbeing course, which is for sessions over four weeks, with a final telephone call at the end to see if I want any further help. The purpose of the course is to train me to be my own therapist, although one to one sessions are available later if required. So, I’ll go along and see how that goes.

Next I had a visitor, a friend who lost her son, a talented and much-loved musician, only a couple of years ago. She came for a cup of tea and we talked about all kinds of things, our shared experiences, her continuing grief over her loss but also revisiting good memories, we talked about the past, the present, the future, mutual friends and a lot about music and how much it means to us. Her visit was definitely a positive thing for me, and I hope, for her also.

Tomorrow, I’ll be going to Grenoside Crematorium, to take part in the Christmas memorial service, for the third year running. Along with Sarah Mac, we’ll be singing a couple of Christmas songs. So yesterday afternoon I went across to Sarah’s to help finish the mixing process of the two backing tracks that we have recorded, it’s been a very productive couple of days, and I’ve learned so much about the recording and engineering of the tunes, which has been really positive, learning a new skill is always good for the soul, and to learn something related to my greatest passion is doubly so.

To end what was a good day all in all, I went to Picture House Social to see my friend Emily play a support slot. Emily is super talented, a lovely woman and a great friend, and last night her performance was as good as I have seen her perform, her guitar playing was effortless and note perfect and her singing was breathtaking, she shone brightly last night, from her sparkly top to her shimmering vocals and stage presence, all in all her set was well received. The headline act Jordan Mackampa has a beautiful voice, and the songs were nicely put together, but very much of a muchness, it would make fabulous background music to relax to or to work to, but it wasn’t inspiring me to dance like nobody was watching.

Maybe it was because I had a long day, maybe it was just that it was a good day, but last night I managed more sleep in one night than I have managed all week, all of which has given me a positive kick this morning, I feel a little bit livelier a little bit brighter, and more able to face the next steps on this journey, which may take the route of a huge leap of faith, more of which to come.

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